From the Present:

Today was miserable. Though I live too close to the equator for the seasons to change, my sore throat, fever and sinus infection remind me of seasonal illnesses from when I lived in the Midwest of the States.

I’ve spent all day in bed and don’t know how it’s already 9pm. This entire day has slipped away, most of it in frustration. I am trying to launch a website with some of my writing contacts, and today I just realized that given the amount of time I have to put into it, the ambitious plan I had will never come to fruition. So at the last minute I am scaling it back, and I spent much of the day battling with my third world Internet, and trying to figure out how to use different word press themes.

I wander some times what I am reaching for. I am directing myself so entirely towards so many different goals. It’s a shame to only have one life to live… The older I get the faster time seems to tick by. I guess the older you get the less margin you have for error.

It’s hard sometimes to wrap my head around these past journal entries. I can read about September, 1996, I read about the rock and minneral show that I entered and won second place at. At the time that meant so much to me, and while it’s a fond memory, I wonder what it is. What part of that past, now well over a decade behind me, exists still in me today?

Religions, false as I may find them to be, at least give us this. The give us purpose and the promise of eternity. And on some days, I think we all need to believe in something of that sort.

From the Past: 

September, 29 1996 – Age 11

Boy today was great. I got second place at the rock and mineral show. 

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